Lonely IVs

Lonely IVs

The tumbling The crumbling of the hostel plaster and my tingling legs. Seeings stars Behind bars My brunette hair On the concrete Framing a new vision The world looks the same Horizontally it turns out. I thought maybe I could just lay there forever No one seemed to notice A sigh Don't worry I got [...]

Grown Up Christmas

Grown Up Christmas

Grown up Christmas is a time machine is a particular kind of grief is a disappointment is releasing expectations is about not gripping too tightly letting the day slip from your hands it's just a day, anyway. Grown up Christmas is on a Wednesday bookended by work operating shifts happy holiday expressions murmured as you [...]

On Whiplash

On Whiplash

We all know that Real change is an inside job But what about when the outside whirls past Quicker than my heart has time to process Than my veins have time to pump This new blood Refreshed with oxygen and optimism Through all the cracks and corners in my body. I’ve always had poor circulation, [...]

How easily i find myself slipping into melancholy

How easily i find myself slipping into melancholy

How easily I find myself slipping into melancholy A steely grey overtone permeates my innermost workings, the cracks in my brain ooze wistfulness when pressed. Even when things are going well the sun can be shining and still it’s like a London fog descends upon my essence and I find myself floating through the world [...]

Split Ends

Split Ends

I went to the hair salon They told me my hair was so healthy No split ends! Really well taken care of. I went to the dentist “You have beautiful teeth,” said the hygienist. “Keep up the great work!” said my (female, notably) dentist as she scraped at my $3-grand pearly whites for 8.2 seconds. [...]

Are All Transitions Created Equal?

Are All Transitions Created Equal?

It’s become pretty clear to me over the years that I am not the best at handling transitions. I mean, sure, an onlooker may dip in and see that my whole life up to this point has been a series of really big transitions, all pursued and fought for and secured by yours truly, but [...]

Park Wine

I remember that patch of grass Where we sat on a weekend afternoon in July I made daisy chains and you taught me to juggle We drank red wine from plastic cups Life was infinite I was happy Genuinely You were in my tshirt I tucked a flower behind your ear The grass was so [...]

Why I Needed to Move Across an Ocean to Find Myself

Why I Needed to Move Across an Ocean to Find Myself

Last year, I moved across the Atlantic from small town South Carolina to London, England. I had just graduated from college and was bewildered at this wonderful adventure I had managed to stumble into — London has always kind of had a knack for finding me (but more on that later..). I get teary-eyed thinking about all I’ve managed [...]

On The Moments That The Words Don’t Reach

On The Moments That The Words Don’t Reach

(Note: I went to see Hamilton this weekend, and YES, the show was incredible, and what has really shaken me to my core is the song about the Hamiltons moving uptown). Learning to live with the unimaginable. What do you do when there is nothing to do? When the shadow has taken root deep in your heart, made [...]